In the morning we make the bed.  We straighten the sheets and comforter after having shared our sleep and loving time together.  I look forward to our nights in bed.

We swirl and blend.  Boundaries interchange as we passionately express our love and lust.  You come to me and me to you.  We hold on to each other.  Ecstasy passes through our bodies.

We have strong feelings.  Our body heat increases.  Animated and intense we communicate.  Connected, our energy and life expands.  The passion and heat inside us, between us, and among us becomes a major fuel source for our lives.

So far, it’s pretty steamy.

But there is another wonderful phase, literally sleeping with your mate and lover (preferably one in both).  Let’s back up a moment.  You’ve heard the expression “they slept together” as a euphemism to avoid the term “they had sex together.”  When you are actually sleeping with someone, there is no sex taking place.  You are just sleeping. Human beings and other mammals do not generally have sex when they are sleeping.

Actually, sleeping with your mate, yes just sleeping, is an extraordinary bond between the two who regularly share the bed together.  To have both people getting under the covers together more nights than not and being in close proximity, perhaps having some physical contact, whether it might be a hand from one of the two merely touching their partner’s elbow or just spooning the night away, without any sexual activity.

Sleeping together with your mate can be delicious.  Unfortunately, some couples keep as far away from each other as possible while sharing the bed.  For one’s own mental health, it is best to enjoy sexual pleasure and to just feel comfortable, the kind of  “I trust you and feel safe with you and I love you in bed and outside of bed, too, kind of love.”

Enjoy your life in and out of bed with your mate and relate, and your anxiety and depression may go away with no great freight.

This is Dr. Jonathan Brower saying, so long for now.  I’ll be back next week.  If you’d like to call me, 818-707-4557, Pease feel welcome.