We’ve got a big problem, at least in North America. What’s the problem? The problem is that we expect quick results NOW much of the time. Bart Simpson goes nuts when he has to wait thirty seconds to have his non-nutritious pop-tart heated in the microwave. We’re in a nation of quick fixes, quick twitters, quick this and quick that. It’s as though there is little time for slow and glow.
Have you noticed when you call someone on the phone, whether a friend or some person in a business, the person will say, “I’ll be with you in a second?” It rarely is for a second. In some cases, it may be some minutes before they can get back to you. Why does the person on the other end of the phone line say, “I’ll be with you in a second?” Because they give you the illusion that they can be incredibly fast. But it’s just fake. It’s too manic. We’re supposed to be fast and not last.
People go wild with all kinds of frantic ways to lose weight fast, to make huge money fast, to have your first house by the time you’re twenty three or loath yourself that you’re a failure. We eat fast, drive fast, complain fast, talk fast, try this fast and that fast.
Where and when do we have time to slow down and make good secure and loving attachments with people we love? How often do you slow down your frizzled/sizzled insides? It takes time to have the mindfulness of how you feel your emotions in your body. Lots of people are too frantic, too anxious to even know they have a whole inner world within themselves. They’re going fast. Fast fast fast fast. And then what? Crash crash crash crash.
We’re good at being fast, but fast for what? We’re in a rut. We devalue ourselves? Can we continue to be overwhelmed with “things” and not get enough of what we really need?
When we can slow down and make really wonderful connections/attachments with people we love and care about, our beings are happier, calmer and downright delicious. Scarfing down an apple pie may be delicious, but holding hands with someone you love is way more delicious than the pie.
So, what might you consider doing that doesn’t have to be fast and frantic? Are you willing to be slowing down, smelling the flowers, listening intensely to someone you deeply care about? Perhaps you could ask your kids what they like learning in school rather than just asking them about their grades.
When my sister and I were young teenagers, at times we’d play this game of sorts where we’d talk in a slow, southern drawl. We’d really stretch out every syllable; way beyond what was normal slow southern accents. It really felt fun to make an average sentence last about twenty seconds. But more than just fun, there was a wonderful free feel letting time being elongated with no rush in mind.
This is Dr. Jonathan Brower letting you know that you may slow down and find out what’s inside you that you like a lot, whenever it fits your schedule. Call me if you’re so inclined. 818-707-4557.
